I’m quietly happy to share my first interview with FemMetal. It feels right to start this journey with a band whose music touches not just the ears, but the heart and soul. Ammify’s music is the kind that reaches every sense and emotion, leaving a deep impact. I had the chance to talk with Ammy, who, along with her bandmate Pete, creates these moving sounds. Their story and music stay with you, and I hope you find something in it that speaks to you.
Enjoy.
Lucy
Hello Ammy, how are you?
Ammy
Hiiiii! 😀 I’m good! How are you? 🙂
Lucy
I’m doing well, thank you! Really excited about this interview! “Lost, Not Hiding” resonates like a whisper from the shadows. What inspired the album’s title and its deeply woven themes?
Ammy
There was a lot about this album that was just magic. Peter actually came up with the title as an option and it was just very immediately YES, THAT ONE. The album’s songs are all about a mental health journey. The writing of it came at a time when I was recovering in a mental health hospital, so the lyrics are all very raw, personal and real, and I’m not really a sharer at the best of times haha. I didn’t really think we’d get signed and get this kind of response to be fair, and I have to admit I was a little bit nervous about sharing it, but I don’t want to be ashamed of that journey, and I don’t want anyone else to be ashamed of theirs, so heck yeah I’ll share my insides! Let’s be vulnerable and proud and find our strength together in that 🙂
Lucy
I really appreciated the theme and topics you talk about in your music. How did your partnership with Pete Renzullo in Ammify influence the creation and essence of “Lost, Not Hiding”?
Ammy
This is another of those magic things hehe. I would get the music from Pete and write something to what he sent, so it already had the vibe… if that makes sense. And somehow everytime, whatever that vibe was, matched perfectly with something I was dealing with, so by the time we combined both of our parts, it was like we completely understood what each other were going for without even talking about it. It was crazy!
Lucy
Your voice seems to carry echoes of pain and beauty. How do you infuse your personal sorrows and joys into your singing?
Ammy
That’s super sweet 🙂 I’m really glad you feel that way. I think getting the emotion across is the goal right? It’s so easy to just sing the notes and be a robot hehe. As for how, I don’t actually know! I had a moment listening back to the completed album and went “woah this is emotional” haha. So I honestly think it just genuinely there.
Lucy
Which song on the album challenged you the most, either in writing or in performance, and what made it so difficult?
Ammy
Ooo! A few for a few different reasons!
“Coward’s Way Out” was difficult in worrying about what people would think. I honestly thought it’d cause some issues because it is a song written from a suicide note, but no one batted an eyelid! But I really thought turning it into a song was a power move!
“Grief” was Pete’s idea, he said to do one about the stages of grief with no lyrics, so, I just had to stand there and feel things and see what came out. When I finished I just had to not think about it and send it to him, and when it all came together it was jaw-dropping to me. Man, it feels like grief.
“Involuntarily Celibate” was the last one I wrote on the album and I felt a lot of pressure on myself cause we were so happy with all the ones so far, imagine if the last one was a fizzer! Once I started on the theme that the song is, I *could not* stop laughing. Also, there’s aggressive swear words and that’s not a thing I usually do haha.
“Favourite” is hard to sing without crying, even if I feel totally fine a lump will just get in there and be annoying. Go away dumb feelings. Even the recording is me having to sing rather strained with a tight throat. I didn’t know why that was happening until I realised how emotional it was for me and the effect that has on your voice… woops. Good knowing yourself Ammy *clap clap* haha
Lucy
hahaha! Can you take us through the creation of one of your favorite tracks on “Lost, Not Hiding”?
Ammy
Yes indeedy doo I can! AND, if you’re interested, Peter has a video on how he does it from his end! But he basically is a super genius and has an amazing idea and sends it to me and I listen to it a few times. For this album, I used like, a free-flow method? It might have a name but I’m not sure, but essentially I would just sing random things over the top of the song, and then expand on whatever that was. It was like the song was already written and just needed to be plucked out of the sky. 🙂
Lucy
Brilliant 🙂 I will definitely check the video. The album artwork is haunting and evocative. What is the story behind its creation and its connection to the music?
Ammy
This is all Pete’s genius too. He does all sorts of cool Easter egg-type things, like on some of the videos there are glitch sounds that are actually the songs on the album sped up 50 bargillion times. (Bargillion is a word). I can’t take any credit for the artwork hehe 😀
Lucy
How do you find the balance between vulnerability and strength in your lyrics and performances?
Ammy
That’s a really cool question! And I once again have a terribly unhelpful answer haha! I am really really happy that both vulnerability and strength comes through, but I’m not doing anything on purpose or specifically to make anyone feel that way 🙂 it’s all just being honest I think. 🙂
Lucy
What emotions or messages do you hope listeners will carry with them after experiencing “Lost, Not Hiding”?
Ammy
Mostly I want people going through big mental health things to not feel alone. I want everyone to be able to move past their shames, and I want everyone to forgive themselves for not meeting their own standards and to understand that sometimes things can be messy, and hopeless, and that’s legitimately a very normal part of life. As cliche as it is, you reaaalllyyy need to be kind to yourself, because you can’t move forward until you do.
Lucy
As a Metal vocalist, where do you see your artistic journey heading with Ammify and beyond?
Ammy
I have been in 2 “metal” bands in my life, but I wouldn’t consider myself a metal vocalist. Just a vocalist who likes metal haha. Maybe if I did more harsh vocals 😛 I hope to just keep writing and making stuff I’m proud of. If people get to hear it and or even enjoy it then extra win 🙂
Lucy
Thank you for the interview, Ammy. Do you have any final thoughts or words you’d like to leave with us?
Ammy
Thank you for having me! Your questions were really interesting and thought-provoking and I really appreciated them 😀 thanks for being a legend.
